Brand: Holsten Premium. "German Purity Law of 1516"- gimmick
Type: Lager? I sort of feel like Holsten is to beer what a 'table red' is to wine.
Taste: See Above. This beer is a collection of negative propositions: not light, not dark; not terrible, but not that good.
Occasions: Until you're out of the stock you bought when they were deeply discounted at the LCBO. Good to offer to the guest that always says yes to a meal, joint and a beer or 3, but never reciprocates. Hey maybe he/she can't afford it. In which case he'll be used to a subpar beer.
Best Paired with: your mom
Notes: There is a banner on the corner of the label that says 'Imported Beer'. I guess most imports say this somewhere, but Holsten does it in a way that seems to be overly compensating. As if they are saying- we can't be that bad, we're European!!
Did you know that Haagen Dazs is made up name? Brand association. with a continent.