lamenotlame

BOOMBOX from Ely Kim on Vimeo.

I want to make one! have each clip be a clickable video beside the song selection. OR, or make a video for all my favorite songs, or for a given playlist so it plays as a visualizer. Ok that is a bit too much. I'll stick with the visual jukebox

my cell consistently suggest 'atones' when I am trying to type 'bummer'. I don't really talk about atoning much, particularly not in my texts, and in the 3rd person singular.
Said cell also just suggested 'fart' while I was trying to type 'earth'. That one is a little more understandable.
I have a list of these little gems, send me good ones!

From McSweeney's:

Respectful Yo Mama Jokes

Yo mama is so healthy her BMI is probably exactly within the ideal range for a woman her age.

Yo mama is so well respected within her profession that I bet she'll get another raise and promotion this year despite the downward trajectory of the economy.

Yo mama is so good at cooking she should open her own restaurant. I'd be the first customer.

Yo mama is so attractive she could be on the cover of Prevention.

Yo mama is so Internet-savvy she should start her own social-networking site designed specifically for moms. It would be really popular.

Yo mama is so well read she could teach a course on literature at an accredited university.

Yo mama is so good at listening she makes you feel like she's put everything aside to focus all her attention on you. That's a really great trait to have.

Yo mama is so skilled at coaching basketball she should apply for a job in the WNBA.

Yo mama is so generous she just paid for everyone's meal at Applebee's.

Yo mama is so supportive of you and your efforts that I wouldn't be surprised if you were incredibly successful as a result.

this weekend E and I saw a man working on his car. The car was a brown hatchback from the seventies, and if he was a car, he'd be that one. There was a bucket already full and catching more (transmission?) fluid. He smoked while he worked. This morning the car was surrounded by two firetrucks and a towtruck. A woman in her bathrobe stood at the curb. I didn't get a glimpse of the car.
wonder how that story fills in.
I thought this song couldn't have more good vibes than it already does. Then I spent the weekend dancing to it with E

my DIY to-go container that consisted of pouring champagne into an empty beer bottle was not as clever as I initially thought

E is here!

seen on a travel agency sign:
"A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving" -Lao Tzu
that sounds like a pretty solid argument against having a travel agent. haha, they lose.
Old Lao (Taoist extraordinaire) was also the dude that that came up with that heavily abused quote:
"the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."
I guess it's true, but inspirational posters, forwards and 7 Habits lovers everywhere have pretty much made it vile. In that way, Lao Tzu is sort of like a Chinese Ralph Waldo Emerson. Emerson has some decent ideas, but he is also the schmuck behind this cheeseball:
"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us"
puke.
buuut he also said this gem:
"Children are all foreigners"
I've been feeling that a lot lately.

from this guy

me: my farts are noxiousi had to leave from helping out early because my body was so stiff from holding them inI had to pretend i had a bad backHeather: ha. i love ityou should have just walked outside and fartedme: well I couldnt have done that every 10 minutes for two and a half hoursplus i would have had to stand there and let it disconnectprevent the trailHeather: im getting pretty good at that at workme: disconnecting the trail?Heather: i had tofu chilli for lunch and had to fart a lot todayme: yeah cabbage soup was my culpritHeather: yea i walk to an area with no people, act busy and then slowly walk back to my areame: i blamed their dogquietly as if i was trying to be subtle about being offendedps. i laughed out loud at your techniqueHeather: good. i laugh as im doing it

Heather noted an important addition to the museum gas story- I didn't just hold them in- I actually let out an audible fart, laughed and only then notice two seated young fellows directly beside me, head level to my ass. I scooted H and B away from the area, leaving the chaps to enjoy the aftermath on their own.
these things are worth knowing

Elizabeth: hawell, arent you pioushttp://vancouver.en.craigslist.ca/zip/1159957474.html

went to vanc last weekend. mainland two weeks in a row- I'm on a roll. the usual:
missed the ferry. both ways. sigh. yam fries and amazing view made up for it. so finally got there. drinks, walks, drinks, scammed drinks from a charity event (woops), then Eliz! next morning she made Dave and I the most amazing breakfast, better than any brunch joint- plus she MADE the jam. I swear to god I should have married her when I had the chance.
Tuesday Head and Bytron and I went to a special opening reception of the new museum exhibit- Treasures from the Royal British Museum (thanks head!). stuffed ourselves with the free food first, which in retrospect was not the best idea as I was doing the stiff legged fart walk through the whole crowded thing. You've never seen a byzantine painting of jesus and mary until you've seen it while holding in a hummous fart. Intense concentration

from here

hahaha
last december, during my very last week on campus, I was approached to do this picture poll type thing. damn I wish I didn't lose the results. Terribly humiliating. I can't even remember the question now. something about the international laws on capital punishment. I mean I really came off like a clueless jack ass. partly my fault: "uh, I think so". is probably not a great first response when your words are being transcribed. mostly his fault: I said more! also the question as printed in the paper was no a yes or no question. was for me. The guy even knew me!
I think I already wrote about this, but dwelling is sort of my style. Anyway my picture was even printed and you can't hide with glasses like mine. thank god it was the last week.