you know those real estate euphemisms that use words like cozy when the place is small; charming when it's in disrepair; wonderful when there is nothing redeeming. Well another one I've discovered over the years is "perfect for a student" when the place is a pile of shit. Ideal student accommodation= normal people don't bother- you wouldn't live here. surprisingly, my place didn't actually have this on the ad.
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funny sober too!